The 50 Shades of Tinder Trap

It’s popular these days to tell girls and young women “you can have it ALL!”

That is a contemptible lie. They can’t. Nor can men. There are always trade-offs to be made. But when you think you can have it all because you bought into the lie, you make bad choices and become disillusioned or worse when things don’t work out the way you thought they were supposed to.

“Sour grapes” is an old expression based on the Aesop’s Fable Fox and the Grapes. The 10th commandment says thou shall not covet. Envy is considered a mortal sin. “Familiarity breeds contempt,” is an old axiom rooted in Proverbs 25:17. Far too many people who were born and raised in America do not appreciate these long-standing philosophical points at all. There is a decided lack of gratitude for… well, for just about everything. Many of the people have no understanding of the historical context in which they live, where life is fantastically good, safe, fair, comfortable, and long. They are surrounded by luxury, ease, and plenty, and when someone tells them they deserve something, the get all sorts of bent when things don’t work out as perfectly as a Princess Movie.

When a young woman thinks she can make the same choices as a young man and live for the hedonism of moment, she heads down a road that rarely ends well. She does not understand that any sort of “happiness score,” her corporate employee market value, her dating sexual-market value, and her marriage-market value are all entirely different numbers, they are VERY different for women and men, they change over time, and there is no going back. “Fair” has nothing to do with it.

Thanks to apps like “Tinder,” a fairly average-looking woman can easily rack up a hundred sexual partners by the time she’s 30 if she wants to. It’s MUCH harder for a man to do so, because their sexuality is valued very differently. A well-used woman who is 30, with her biological clock ticking loudly as her fertility starts crashing, has been taught to think that she DESERVES a man who is as nice as the young man who took her virginity, a man as handsome as her fourth partner, a man as well-hung as her twelfth partner, a man as rich as her 35th, as kind as her 40th, as smart as her 53rd, as buff as her 55th, as talented in bed as her 68th, as well-read as her 76th, and good with kids as her 89th. Tinder made those matches easy over the years. After reading 50 Shades of Gray she not only thinks such a man exists, she thinks such a man would be interested in her for more than a casual fling for the night. When they cannot be found, or turn her down with a laugh, she gets resentful, bitter, and turns of all men, often trying to turn as many other women as she can against men to support her and tell her she made all the right decisions and it’s the men’s loss, becaus eshe cannot bear to face the possibility that she chose very, very poorly.

Even if she does find a man willing to marry her, she is likely to be sorely disappointed with him, feeling she “settled” for someone who is not nearly as good as she deserved. And she will likely let him know in a hundred small ways about her lack of fulfillment. The chance of happiness for her is low, the chances of a divorce, given the ways the laws are written to favor her, are high. If there are children, their future isn’t that bright, either.

Traditional morality says that a young woman should be chaste until marriage. The statistics for happiness and divorce strongly support that decision pathway as the most statistically successful for her in the long run. Is it the most “fun” in the short term? No. But would you think it a good trade to exchange a few years of fun for a lifetime of sorrow and regret? It’s like the high of drugs that leave you dead in a ditch by 30.

A woman who honestly thinks that her job market value, her sexual market value, and her marriage market value are the same, and change in similar ways to a man’s, is not only delusional, she’s not nearly as bright as she thinks she is, because she’s not even able to understand the reality that is literally all around her every day. She is deliberately ignoring the fundamental facts of basic biology. She’s swallowed the leftist lie hooker, line, and sinker, and it will leave her one of the losers in Darwin’s game of survival of the fittest, as defined by successful reproduction. This leads to all sorts of mental problems…. But I’ll leave that to another post.

But people can wake up from the lies. And it is a beautiful thing when it happens, as in this video I came across yesterday;

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